The Day Knights of Round Went Wrong
by sephsama4444
Summary: It all started out when Aeris wanted Cloud to get her Knights of Round... Rated R for lotsa cussin and posible sexual themes in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

The Day Knights of Round Went Wrong  
  
Chapter 1  
  
"Hey Cloud, If you get me Knights of Round then use it to defeat Emerald Weapon, I'll give you a reward." said Aeris. "Sure!" said Cloud. After he ran off, Aeris thought to herself, I hope this works. Cloud had been bugging the hell out of her for weeks, so she decided she would get back at him, by making him do things that might get him killed. Strangely he always came back alive no matter what.  
  
An hour later he came back.  
  
"Hey, Aeris, I got the materia but I decided you and Red XIII would go together to watch me defeat Emerald Weapon."  
  
"Sure."  
  
So they all leave on the submarine with Underwater Materias, their weapons, and Knights of Round.  
  
"Let's test out Knights of Round first." said Red XIII.  
  
So Cloud summons it.  
  
But some how, instead of working properly, King Arthur, Sir Robin, Sir Lancelot, Sir Bedemir, and Sir Galahad along with some minstrels appeared (basically the characters from Monty Python and the Holy Grail.).  
  
Arthur: I am Arthur, King of the Britons and we seek the Holy Grail.  
  
Cloud: (rudely) what's with the weird acce-?  
  
He is interrupted by Sir Robin's Minstrels singing their crappy song.  
  
Suddenly, Emerald Weapon appears.  
  
Emerald Weapon: Hey, what's with the noise?!?!?!?  
  
Red XIII: Hey! You can talk!!!  
  
Sir Lancelot: Halt foul creature! I, Sir Lancelot shall- (gets eaten by Emerald)  
  
Emerald Weapon: Shut up so I can continue with my date!  
  
Everyone: WHAT THE HELL YOUR ON A DATE!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?  
  
Emerald Weapon: Damn right I am! (looks over to Ruby Weapon) Hey baby, how 'bout we go and make some fireworks?  
  
Ruby Weapon: Yeah Baby!  
  
The Weapons leave.  
  
Cloud: How 'bout we make like them and find a room eh Aeris?  
  
Aeris: No! (Hits Cloud with staff)  
  
Suddenly a man in black armor comes and faces King Arthur.  
  
Black Armor Guy: I'm the black knight and I shall slay thee, I am the one with invincibility!  
  
Arthur slices off all his limbs, his head and stabs him. Black Knight: I'm not dead yet! I'm feeling better! I'm- (Bursts open revealing Sephiroth)  
  
Sephiroth: SEPHIROTH! I AM THE GREAT AND ALMIGHTY SEPHIROTH MWAHAHAHAHAHAHA (flys off)  
  
Cloud: What a wuss  
  
Sephsama4444: (me the author!) (appears out of nowhere) Oh look whos talking (flicks Cloud is off)  
  
Cloud: You little bitch (raises sword)  
  
Sephsama4444: Yo mama!  
  
Aeris: Cloud, you dummy, he's the author! You can't argue with the author!  
  
Arthur: Thou art a stupid ass.  
  
Sephiroth: (appears again) I agree.  
  
Sephsama4444: Four against one Strife! Give up or get kicked out of the story.  
  
Cloud's face turns red with anger and embarrassment.  
  
Cloud: Fine. I give up.  
  
Sephsama4444: Loser. (disappears)  
  
Sephiroth: Spikey-@$$ (flys off)  
  
Red XIII: Well, that's over. I say we help King Arthur find his Holy Grail.  
  
Sir Robin: Wow that Sephiroth guy is braver than Sir Lancelot!  
  
Sir Bedemir: That's cause your real name is Sir Robin the not as brave as Sir Lancelot  
  
King Arthur: Well let's go! Come Patsy. Clip Clop! Clip Clop!  
  
To Be Continued~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Sephsama4444: Well Whadaya think?  
  
It's my first time at writing fanfics so please review, review, review!  
  
If you don't, my friend Sephiroth here will have to get his sword bloody ^_^  
  
Just Kidding  
  
Sephsama4444~ 


	2. Chapter 2

The Day Knights of Round Went Wrong  
  
Chapter 2  
  
After our heroes got out of the ocean, they started to search for the holy grail. Little do they know about the dangers ahead. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Cloud: So Mr. Arthur, got a clue where this holy grail might be?  
  
Arthur: I have no idea  
  
Sephsama4444's Voice: (echoing eerily) You shall never find it  
  
Cloud: Will too!  
  
Sephsama4444's Voice: Will not!  
  
Cloud: Will too!  
  
Sephsama4444's Voice: Will not!  
  
Cloud: Will too!  
  
Sephsama4444's Voice: Will not!  
  
Cloud: Will too!  
  
Sephsama4444's Voice: Will not!  
  
Cloud: Will too!  
  
Sephsama4444's Voice: Will not!  
  
Cloud: Will too!  
  
Sephsama4444's Voice: Will not!  
  
Red XIII: Cloud, just ignore him.  
  
After an hour or so, they reach a castle  
  
Arthur: I am Arthur, King of the Britons. My men and I seek food and shelter for a night!  
  
Guy1: (at top of castle) This castle is of the French! We will not welcome you here!  
  
Guy2: (looks down from castle) You stupid bitches! You don't even have horses!  
  
Guy3: (also looking down) Are those coconuts?  
  
Sir Galahad: (sarcastically) No they're South American pigeons.  
  
Very Idiotic Guy: Really?  
  
Cloud: No shit Sherlock!  
  
Very Idiotic Guy: My name isn't Sherlock it's-  
  
Sir Bedemir: Who cares what your name is, all we know is that the earth is banana-shaped.  
  
After several hours of very stupid arguing, our heroes finally decide to leave.  
  
Sir Robin: (whimpering) i-i-i-i-i-t-t-t-t'ssssss so d-d-d-d-d-dark! Lets q- q-q-q-q-quickly f-f-f-find a place to sleep!  
  
Sir Galahad: Hey! Someone pinched my ass!  
  
Cloud: Uhh.... I thought you were er. Aeris?  
  
Hologram of Sephiroth: Well Cloud, you've finally proven that you are gay.  
  
Aeris: (giggling)  
  
Arthur: No nonsense friends, we must find a place to rest  
  
A while later.......  
  
Arthur: Here we are. I guess this place will have to do  
  
Red XIII: I have a tent with me, who will use it?  
  
Aeris: I will! I'm going to set it up by the hot spring over there so I can bathe. And no peeking!  
  
A few minutes later, Aeris had set up her tent and the others used moss for makeshift beds.  
  
Aeris: (goes into tent and starts undressing)  
  
Cloud: (peeking at her silhouette from a bush with drool coming out of his mouth :p) RRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRWWWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Aeris: (from inside tent) I told you not to peek! (summons phoenix which blows fire at Cloud's ass @_@)  
  
Cloud: (running around holding his ass) HELP!!!! MY BUTTS ON FIRE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Cloud rushes into Aeris's tent and jumps into the spring, which was DEFINITELY A BAD IDEA!!! A second later, the rest of the people hear a loud slap, a bash from a metal staff, a certain exSOLDIER yelping in pain and Aeris shouting "CLOUD YOU PERVERT WHY DID YOU TRY TO GROPE ME???" Cloud comes running out of the tent with a bump on his head and a red handprint across his face. "Damn she hits hard!" Everybody sighs.  
  
That night, everybody is asleep. except for Sir Robin, who is hugging a teddy bear in a death grip and whimpering. He suddenly sees two red glows and strange noises. "AHHHHHH!!!!!! red eyes!!!!!"  
  
Sir Galahad: (mumbling in sleep) Damn yu- gay -hoe cards scaring Sir Robin. Go to sleep you wuss!  
  
Sir Robin: But there are two red glowy things and strange noises  
  
Cloud: Oh sorry, it was just me practicing summon materias  
  
Aeris: (suddenly wakes up and casts sleep on cloud and Sir Robin) We should all benefit from that. I was trying to get some beauty sleep! Next morning.  
  
After everybody woke and Aeris bathed, they headed out. After a while of traveling and listening to coconut-clip-clopping, they reach a town.  
  
Red XIII: Just like any other town I've seen before  
  
Right after he says that, the chanting monks with the boards start parading about.  
  
(chant) (chant) (chant)  
  
(whacks their own head with board)  
  
(chant) (chant) (chant)  
  
(whacks their own head with board)  
  
(chant) (chant) (chant)  
  
(whacks their own head with board)  
  
(chant) (chant) (chant)  
  
(whacks their own head with board)  
  
Cloud: Uh.  
  
Red XIII: Okay then. I take back what I said.  
  
Sephsama4444: So how was that? A bit cheesy and dumb, but hey!  
  
Sephiroth: Hey! I wasn't in this chapter! I thought I was your favorite character!  
  
Sephsama4444: You are. And don't forget the hologram part.  
  
Sephiroth: Oh well.  
  
Sephsama4444: Don't worry Sephiroth, I'll give you a better part sometime. And before I forget, FF7 is the copyright of Squaresoft. Don't wanna get sued ya know?  
  
Sephsama4444~~~~ 


End file.
